The Life of an Expat, Part Two
In Part One of The Life of an Expat, I talked about the expatriate phenomenon of feeling like your life is on hold. We’ll get that dog when we move back. We’ll have that baby when we’re in a place where doctors speak better English. Yes, we’ll have a house. Someday. When we’re somewhere else in the world that’s more appropriate for such a thing.
And sometimes those “somedays” turn into not just months, but years. And even though to outsiders, we’re living our lives to the fullest (heck, we’re living a life most can only dream of), we can’t help but think part of us is just waiting for a return to the familiar before we do those certain things.
Another thing that’s hard about expatriate life is that you learn to love more than one country. You learn new ways of doing things. Some you hate. But some you like better. In Sarah Turmbull’s book about expat life, Almost French: Love and a New Life in Paris
Even though I do my own fair share of complaining about certain things Swiss, the reality is, it will be hard to leave when (and if) that time comes. Hard to leave my neighbor, my Swiss friends, my expat friends, and a country that almost feels like home. Key word, almost.
Which brings me to the point. As expatriates, we often don’t know how to answer the simple question, “where’s home?” Your adopted country is just that—adopted. And while you’re adopting, your home country becomes more and more foreign.
When I go back to the United States now, I can’t help but criticize all the gas guzzling cars, the wasteful packaging on products, and the stores that stay open on national holidays. But at the same time I can’t wait to eavesdrop on conversations while I eat deep-dish pizza and drink bottomless beverages. I thought living abroad would make me a more educated and international person, but deep down, I think I’m just more confused. Happily confused, but still.
What do you think? If you’re an expat, does your life feel like it’s on hold sometimes? Do you feel cursed loving more than one place? What do you love and what do you dislike about expat life?
For more on this topic, visit Part One, over on One Big Yodel.
Tags: expat, expat in switzerland, expat life
Yep, completely agree again. I find that whenever I’m in the US I refer to Switzerland as home. And whenever I am in Zurich I refer to the US as home. So basically, I am never home. I need to change that way of thinking methinks.
I’ve been thinking a lot about the “someday” feeling lately. I think because I’m getting married soon, I’m naturally thinking more about all the things that will come – kids, professional advancement, even things like buying furniture that will last for years. And while I don’t necessarily feel as though I’m holding back from life in Chile, I do still see us eventually ending up in the US, so there are some things (like buying some super heavy high-quality dining table that I’d have to ship, or taking a trip to SE Asia when it’s SO much shorter and cheaper from California) that I’m not doing yet. It can be tough to find the balance!
The question I keep coming back to again and again is this – Is it really necessary to “belong” to a particular place or culture? In the forseeable future, we will be living in a more homogenised world, where it will become more and more easier to travel and exchange thought. In such a world, do regional and cultural identities act as barriers to freedom? Or is it that we will discover that the easier it becomes to access the world, the more we want to find an anchor.
In the last few years of living abroad, I’m inclined to lean towards the latter on bad days, and the former on good ones!
Hi Meghan, yes, the home thing is a hard one. I find myself doing the same thing.
Emily, yes, the “someday” thing is tough. We buy all second-hand appliances because we don’t want to invest too much in something we might have to get rid of soon. But it’s always that “might” thing that’s hard.