Searching for yourself can be tough

By Chantal Panozzo

Moving abroad can be difficult. Suddenly you’re far away from friends and family and the ways of life that you knew best. It can be isolating. It can be confusing. And if you’re a trailing spouse who has given up your job so your spouse can advance his, it can feel like you’ve lost your identity.

So how do you gain that identity back?

By focusing on what you love. By giving yourself goals to accomplish. By becoming that hidden person you always wanted to be.

For me, this meant focusing on my writing. Giving myself goals so that I would write a book while also getting to know fellow writers. Writing a blog also helped me accomplish this. So has founding a group and event.

Part of my work as a writer abroad meant co-founding a writing workshop. It’s called the  Zurich Writers Workshop and the first event will be held October 1-3, 2010. It will feature workshops in both fiction and creative non-fiction writing. The instructors will include New York Times Bestselling Author Susan Jane Gilman and University of Oxford Fiction Tutor Amal Chatterjee. You’re invited.

Other expats I know have found their place by taking art or language classes, creating greeting cards and selling them at local markets, or taking leadership roles in already established clubs like the American Women’s Club of Zurich. I know expats who have also learned to play the alphorn and made Swiss friends in the process, found part-time jobs volunteering, and others who focus on entering sporting events like triathlons and bike races. And then of course, there’s always the option of looking for a job that will allow you to continue the career you had before. Just remember to have patience. No matter what you focus on, developing a new identity takes time.

Have you found your identity in your adopted country? If so, what was key for you?

Chantal Panozzo is a writer in Switzerland who has written for a variety of publications on two continents. She’s the author of One Big Yodel, a blog about life in Switzerland and moving abroad, and also discusses living abroad as a freelancer at Writer Abroad.

Tags: expat in switzerland, expat life, identity, Switzerland, writing, Zurich

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You hit on so many important points, Chantal. Even though I’m not a “trailing” spouse in the traditional sense, I did uproot my life to move to southern Italy to join my would-be husband. And you are right … it is tough to “refind” yourself. I think patience is key, as is taking a risk. I think you have to “put yourself out there” even more when you are in a new country.

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